In my years, I have read a lot about autism. Often it has been trying to figure out how to live but more often lately it has been as part of interest rather than necessity. One of my favourite autistic bloggers is Samantha Craft, the author of Everyday Asperger’s, which has recently become a book that I look forward to getting hold of. One post that has struck home with me was posted in 2012, entitled ‘116 Reasons I Know I Have Aspergers‘. Some of those reasons don’t apply to me necessarily – I wouldn’t, for example, pair red fluffy socks with high-heels (and not just because I don’t own either one) – but others just crystallise what it can be like. These are my top three:
What exactly is a guilty pleasure? And why would people do something that makes them feel guilty?
Just relax. Not comprehending. What does it feel like to relax?
Doesn’t everyone have a voice reminding them what to do during a conversation: make more eye contact, step closer, nod your head, smile, but not too big, insert giggle, let them talk more.
I’m going to take these in order. I think I am reasonably open here in what I write about. I have written, for example, about what music I listen to on the way to work and especially the Alex Salmond dance. (See Going Home for details of that one.) I have also written about the fact I don’t mind a bit of Taylor Swift now and then. What were once my guilty pleasures have since helped me connect with people.
Seriously, I am rubbish at relaxing. My idea of relaxing is going somewhere on a bus, after all. When I can’t be bothered, I just don’t get out of bed. Even then I feel guilty, for a bit, at least.
That last one is one I don’t have too often but sometimes I do. I would add after the giggle: ‘ask a question or two’. It’s close to what I understand flirting to be too but then again I don’t understand that much. Being social is so confusing. There are so many layers and factors to consider when dealing with other people. Sometimes it’s better to follow number 4 on the list: ‘Do I have to leave the house?’ It’s just easier all round but not always by any means.
Some time I will need to make my own list. It would include discussions of earphones, crossing the road to avoid walking behind people, swearing, putting water on my face and probably the delights of the Wispa chocolate bar. Any suggestions would be gratefully received.